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 | Fixture Details | |  | | |
Home | Return to Division Fixtures
| Division: |
Division 2R |
| Home Team: |
Dorking 1 |
| Away Team: |
RAC 2 |
| Date: | 09 Oct 2012 (confirmed) |
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| Time: | 07:30 pm |
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| Verified: | 11 Oct 2012 by JLM |
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| Report: | The Unofficial: Dorking Bulls v RAC 2 Home 9th October 2012 Author: Kubo Kenevil
Some might say…….that Pamplona is the only place for any decent self respecting “wanna be bull”. However, the season kicked off its shackles and mane, with Dorking’s own “Bulls on the charge”.
Fielding a full strength side it was a welcome return of the Healed Hobbling Hobbit Stormin, and his Horsham Dynamo bro Rob. The wise heads of Hazza, Chairman Bob and I-I-Capitan Si knocked out a decision that the evening’s scoring was destined American par rules to 11………..
First on at numero 2, I was up against a fine Italian stallion, Claudio D’Angelo……..although he said his name was Scottish???? Ah yes…big smile on his face…Not an inch of fat on his body, he looked like a supreme athlete. Now being an RAC boy, they possess two common traits…they are gentleman and have worked in the square mile. Claudio was no exception and the obscenities uttered were in Italian that only chairman Bob could capisci?……….although I am not sure fecking is Italian! Claudio played with some exceptional deception and with some beautiful drops from the back court that would make Bidders proud. I can only comment that my squash was effective and not at all….well pretty! A frustrated Claudio was taken out with a 3-0 result (11-7, 11-6, 11-9). Scotty said I should have played at least one drop shot! Fair point…
On the adjacent court, on at the 3rd string was our Supremo, Captain El Super Si. His opponent was Richard Winter (now that name rings a bell!!). Ding Dong, by the time I saw a little of this meet, I discovered Richard under intense pressure and scampering to every inch of court 2. In fact, to Timbuktu and back! Richard is endowed with some fantastic dynamic retrieval ability, some wicked drops and a powerful cracking backhand whip. However, during this engagement, Super Si had a bit too much masterful domination…….Frankie and I looked at each other and it brought back painful memories of Simon’s reign of peerless terror, using us as training routine fodder! For those of you who have enjoyed the Cheshire cat in Alice, The Maestro had a beaming but not quite smiling grin on his chops. This always signifies destruction of his opponents and Si took this match 3-0 (11-6, 11-5, 11-9).
It was time for the top of the pops show down….Stormin Norman v Jeremy Kryztiniak. Frankie had a savage encounter with the RAC boy last winter, leaving him babbling profanities on court 3, and an impressive thigh haematoma. An accident I believe. Anyway, water under the bridge or rather cellular apoptosis with liquifactive dissolution. Suntanned Jeremy was sporting matching flouro trainers with green T-shirt and showed some great touch combined with some unorthodox improvisations. The match was tight at the beginning with a topsy turvy nature. The ball was skidding fast….a bit like a slimy turd going down the gurgler!......However at one game apiece, James pumped up the jam and got the party goin………cracking the ball with lightning punchy pace. In one rally there was a battle of the mid court……no..no..no…….not piggy in the middle, but who could stop mis-hitting the ball down the middle. Impressive!…….I like it!….….I was grateful to the Frankster for marking…and at one point entertaining us at 11-11 shouting “Hang on, Hang on, Hang on….I haven’t got a clue what happens here”. James Norman straightened the Frankster out, and dished up a nice cold serving of 3-1 (11-2, 2-11, 11-4, 14-12).
At the 4th tier, Dynamo Robert Norman was up against James Masky. I didn’t see much of this match, but Robert has made tremendous strides in his control, consistency and…………..the ability to run to every ball! Possessing immaculate swing technique, considerable power and deep penetration Rob pushed this encounter to a 5th deciding set with Rob victorious 16-14 in the last game. A comment was made that there extremes of both brilliance and……………(a few choice words could go here!!..maybe poo!). It was one for the spectators! Well done Rob 3-2 (11-6, 11-6, 9-11, 13-15, 16-14).
Last on at 5, was Scott Sullivan v James Gardner. Now our Porsche driving auzzie (although recently he has taken to Mercedes) was a little late. This was unexpected, given he had a clear flight path back from the Grohlsh sponsored Jersy fitness boot camp. Guess the empties weighed down the chopper!! A fierce RAC battle ensued. The suileman’s oppo was described as a little solid. Mr. Gardner demonstrated some big hitting power play combined with lovely floated lobs. With the contest poised at 2 games apiece, out came some wall slapping……but can you believe it, from his RAC bro? Scott must be teaching the technique afield……..but with no deadly stair to umpy though!!!!! After this, the ex-captain got his pecker up and showed some neat position play combined with a few very classy drops (and some not so classy). The nasty two beside me wanted to comment on some scurrying up the front on one foot, in honour of Vince (Vince who?…..another deserter, but not to Reigate but to the sweat shops of SEA…pah!). Scottie finished this match 3-2 (8-11, 11-8, 11-6, 9-11, 11-7) and Team Bull took the points 19-5 (5-0).
The RAC boys were great company enjoying the evenings feast of smoked paprika pork goulash with vegetarian pastry pithivier and cheese!. There was Jersey talk of Neal’s stomach cramps, Robin Boreberry, Charlie scratching like a hound with a mad grin, Tapsfield’s elbows and something about Facebook!. Scottie was on the Lucozade all night…..he’ll turn into a diabetic!, said he stayed at the Merton…but I am sure he meant to say Mecure!
A big thank you to the supporters who came along………….Dorking was pleased as Punch! What say you?
Kubo Kenevil
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| Author: | Kubo Kenevil |
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| Notes: | Entered match report for Dorking - no change to result.
...Harriet |
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